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June 11, 2019 at 11:50 am #23511
I have been reading this forum for a couple of weeks now so thought I would join everyone. I was diagnosed with Stage 1A Melanoma a few weeks ago and I have to admit I’m not handling it very well as much as I’m trying. To say it was a shock was an understatement! Would it have been better had I been mentally prepared I don’t know, the Consultant told me at my original appointment I didn’t have anything to worry about and wasnt concerned at all, even told me I could leave it be and have my mole monitored every three months, good job I didn’t listen to him!
I don’t have my pathology report the only things I do know is that it was 0.6mm, not ulcerated with clear margins. I have had my WLE and the results from that were also clear. Now my family, parents etc seem to think i should just trot off be really happy and that’s the end of it. How far from reality is that?! I spend every minute of every day thinking about it, I have spent hours on the I internet reading horror stories of this coming back much much worse than before, basically it just seems like it’s a death sentence! I am trying so hard to go about my daily life work etc but I feel like I’m walking around with this big black cloud hanging over me, I honestly feel like my life is never going to be normal again and I don’t know how to get past that. I know that it was caught early and I’m in a better place than some but nothing anybody says makes me feel any better. I have spent years in the sun both here and abroad and used sunbeds alot when I was young, now at 44 I am paying the price! I keep looking at both of my children age 14 and 7 and thinking what if I never see them grow up and its nobody elses fault but my own!
I think the worse thing about all of this is having nobody to talk to that actually understands and how can anybody understand unless they have been through it?!
My other struggle is, after my initial appointment I have absolutely no faith in my Dr, the specialist nurses are great and I’m back in a weeks time to have my skin check etc but how can I trust this Dr?
We were off to Dubai at the end of July for our annual 2 week holiday but I have even cancelled this. I cannot get my head around having Melanoma let alone dealing with never being able to go in the sun again. Lucky for me in the UK we don’t get to much hot weather, however at the moment I wont even go outside when the sun is out.
I am so so sorry for rambling on but any help or advice would be massively appreciated. Is what I am feeling normal or am I going mad?!
Thank you in advance
Louise xJune 11, 2019 at 3:28 pm #70955
You sound like a fortunate soul to have found your melanoma so early. The likelihood of it coming back is very slim to non existent. I had my melanoma .76 30 years ago! I’m still here and never had a recur. It might be best to learn some relaxation techniques to help you over this shock. You still need the sun for vitamin D but make it during the safe hours, early morning, late afternoon. Wear clothing to protect you, a broad rimmed hat and sunscreen the barrier type. Things will normalize for you eventually. Let us know how you are doing.June 13, 2019 at 11:04 am #70956
Thank you so much for your reply it really is a big help.
30 years out for you, that is truly amazing! Here’s to another 30 years!
I have now managed to get a copy of my Histology report and wondered if you could give your expert advice as I’m really freaking out over a couple of things on it. I will list everything as it reads.
Invasive component present: yes
Growth phase: Radial
Breslow thickness: 0.6mm
Clark Level III
Regression: yes extensive
Tumor infiltrating lymphocytes: absent
Vascular invasion: no
Perineural invasion: no
Pre existing naevus: yes, dysplastic compound naevus
Closest lateral margins: in situ 2mm, invasive 3mm
Closest deep margin: 7mm
Sections show an in situ and invasive malignant melanoma of superficial spreading type. The tumor is in radial growth phase with a breslow thickness of 0.6mm.
I am now frightened to death a, because of the extensive regression which from what I have read is a bad thing as this could mean the thickness was actually alot more and a higher chance of spread etc And b, no lymphocytes present which i believe is also a really bad thing?! C, how can I have in situ and an invasive melanoma??
I hope you can shed some light as I am so worried now from what I have read on the above points. Some state that I should of had a SLNB but this was never offered or even mentioned. It looks like the UK are not up there with you guys, maybe I should get a flight out!
Louise xJune 13, 2019 at 12:17 pm #70957
The two most important prognostic factors according to our experts are the depth (0.6) which is very low risk, and the mitotic factor which was zero, that is the rate of division of cells. It was also said to be in the Radial Growth phase means it hadn’t started to invade deeper levels of skin. So you are very low risk. Please read what we have on the website about pathology:
Regression is a weakly negative factor. A sentinel node biopsy would not be indicated and isn’t any guarantee either. So take good care of yourself, breathe deeply when you feel anxious. I hope this helps you.June 13, 2019 at 5:52 pm #70958
Thank you again Catherine
So looking at that report is there anything that seems concerning like the lymphosytes? Do you know why there wouldn’t be any present? I assume there must have been some at some point because of the regression or have I got that wrong?
I have read the link you attached it is very helpful.
Thank you again I promise i will leave you alone now. XxJune 14, 2019 at 11:01 am #70959
I know these reports can be confusing. But put it away for now and get good skin exams and do your own as well. Practice safe sun behavior and I hope will all go well for you. Keep in touch, we have all been in your shoes and understand the stress and fear that goes along with this. Live in the moment!
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